Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Insights from "Unstoppable": Based on the novel "Derailed" by Sapphire

I watched Tony Scott's movie "Unstoppable" last night, and learned a number of things:
  • Never let fat, dumb guys drive a train.
  • The train that the fat dumb guy is driving will inevitably be loaded with explosive materials.
  • Television stations from Pittsburgh have an infinite number of ENG trucks.
  • Even with infinite numbers of ENG trucks, you can never have enough helicopters.
  • You know those fat, dumb guys? Don't promote them into senior management.
  • Corollary to the previous: Executives always forget that they have insurance when adding up the costs of a disaster.
  • Avoid putting a bending overhead railroad trestle right next to a dozen tanks full of fuel oil in the middle of a city.
  • Fat, dumb guys notwithstanding, Pennsylvania railroads have the best-looking employees.
  • While people from Pennsylvania divide the state into "Western", "Central" and "Eastern", movies about runaway trains in Pennsylvania divide the state into "Northern", Central" and "Southern".
  • The best way to get your wife to lift a restraining order against you is to keep a runaway train from careening off an overhead railroad trestle into a dozen tanks of fuel oil.
All in all, it was a very educational evening.
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